February
is National Snack Food Month. Before you rush out and load up on chips
and snack crackers, chew on this -- eDiets has the services you need to
lose weight and feel better. To choose from 21 different diet and
fitness plans, click here
and fill out
a free profile... NOW!
Today I want to confront a major fear of
many weight-challenged
individuals:
"Will I be fat forever?" Many of us who constantly
repeat the lose-gain
cycle have a fear that we seldom share with others. We are terrified
that we may never be able to lose our excess weight and will have to
live the rest of our lives fat and full of body-hate and self loathing.
If you are one of those people, this article is just for you. Take a
chance and read on. I will talk tough but I promise not to leave you
without hope.
It is a fact that long-term weight loss is very
difficult. Most of us
are not good at it and we have quite a bit of experience with failure
to sustain our losses. Feeling hopeless and cynical about the whole
process is not uncommon. But we hate being fat so we pull ourselves
together, suppress the hopelessness and try the next diet, exercise,
tablet, bracelet or program in hopes that a miracle will occur and we
will find the holy grail of thin before we die.
I don’t have a miracle for you but I have
something almost as
effective: the truth. I don’t mean theological truth as if God has
spoken to you. I mean commonsense, practical truth that has substance
and is based in reality and experience. If you take it to heart and
apply it daily, you will very probably lose weight. It (this truth) has
worked for me and for many of my clients. It can work for you too. Here
it is.
The "I don’t want to be fat forever" truths.
1. If you stubbornly demand and expect that weight
loss and life should
be easy, you will consistently fail at weight loss. Why? Life and
weight loss are often not easy and there is nothing you can do to
change that fact. Long-term weight loss is not for children or sissies.
I wish it was but it is not. Get over it and get on with it.
2. If you allow fear to dictate your life choices
you will feel unable
to cope with life and you will eat to feel better. Then you will get
fatter. You must find a way to create courage instead of honoring your
fears.
3. If you insist in staying in denial about the
real reasons you are
overweight, you will stay fat. For example, do you honestly believe you
are overweight because you "love food?" If you accept this kind of idea
as a legitimate reason, you can expect fat to be your constant
companion.
4. If you insist in doing it yourself (weight
loss) you can expect failure. We all need support and lots of it. The
rule is this: More weight requires more support. Simple and very true.
5. If you think you can be the exception to the
rule and lose
significant weight without significant inner work and inner healing,
you will stay fat. Simple rule: More weight requires more inner work.
6. If you refuse to learn advanced life skills,
you will stay fat. We
overeat when we feel overwhelmed by life. Increase your life skills and
you will eat less. That is the truth. What do I mean by advanced life
skills? Here are some examples.
- Learn to take responsibility for your life
situation and problems instead of blaming others.
- Become an expert on you and your inner self
instead of being an expert on what is wrong with others.
- Learn to seek and receive appropriate support
from others instead of isolating and going it alone.
- Learn healthy and creative self-expression
instead of hiding and suppressing your gifts.
- Develop effective communication skills for work
and relationships.
- Develop your own personal spiritual values and
apply them to all areas of your life.
- Learn to forgive others and also yourself.
- Learn to receive at least as well as you give.
Looking for more? Join eDiets
and visit Dr. Anderson's support
group (Spirituality and Weight Loss)
for interactive support! This group provides positive and inspirational
spiritual support for anyone struggling with weight loss issues.
Support from like-minded individuals helps you stay focused.

Matthew Anderson, D. Min., is a counselor,
organizational
consultant, seminar leader and the author of books and tapes that can
help you overcome your obstacles to well-being. eDiets members
can join Dr. Anderson for his monthly chats.